The Lifeworks Group, Inc.

By Laura Hull, LMFT Coping Coach   This time of year is filled with lights, laughter, and loads of activities.   From the week of Thanksgiving through the end of New Year’s celebrations, this is the most active/busy time of the year for many people.   Though many regard this as a time of happy celebration, there is no doubt it is also a demanding time of the year.    Between decorating, holiday parties, shopping, wrapping, food preparations, family visits, etc., it can be stressful to navigate the expectations that come along with the holidays.   Sometimes the stress is enjoyable.   For some people, the stress is more anxiety provoking than pleasurable.   There is certainly an added social pressure to “enjoy” the holidays.   After all, why would anyone be anxious or depressed when everyone else is partying and enjoying the festivities of the season, right?     We are “supposed “ to be happy during the holidays. ...

By Laura Hull, LMFT Coping Coach   I remember driving down the road a few years ago, coming to a stop light behind a car that bore the bumper sticker that read “Mean People Suck.”   I remember thinking “wow, I hope my kids can’t read that…how crude!” My secondary thought was “wow, that’s just so true. Mean people really do suck.” Though I probably would have chosen a less direct, less crude phrasing such as “Mean People Are An Unfortunate, Unpleasant Reality We Must Deal With.” I guess I could never make a living coming up with clever bumper stickers, but I can make a compelling blog argument for why mean people really do suck and you aren’t required to be around them just because it’s the holiday season.   In a perfect world, everyone would get along nicely, and treat each other with respect.   But inevitably, we run across those people in our social circles, sometimes in our own gene pool, who are deeply miserable and seem to lack the capacity...

  By Laura Hull, LMFT   Coping Coach     I remember life before “the diagnosis.” It’s been over 15 years now, but I remember the cold chill that ran down my spine when the doctor told me that I had an autoimmune disease that would challenge my life going forward. Life changed that day. It was day one of a journey in the re-defining of “me.” Priorities changed, perspective changed, and I found out quickly that the volume of stress, much of it self inflicted, that I had allowed in my life up to that point had contributed, as least in part, to the situation I found myself in….it cost me something in terms of my health. I hope what I will share challenge you to consider the risk and potential consequences of unrecognized/unmanaged stress.   I counsel people to consider the consequences of stress on both their physical health and emotional health.   While no one can avoid stress completely, I think most of us, at times, blindly sign o...

    By Laura Hull, LMFT Coping Coach     I might as well disclose upfront that I am the proud mother of six wonderful kids.   My two oldest sons started college last fall on the same day my youngest child started Pre-Kindergarten.   It was the first time in 18 years that a school year had begun and I had an empty house for a few hours per day.   I am not ashamed to admit to you that I was in the throes of a “woe is me” pity party.   I am not one of those mothers who count down the days of summer vacation, eagerly anticipating and then rejoicing as the summer break comes to an end.   I always miss my children when the school year begins.   I miss them terribly.   But last fall was particularly harsh.   The realization that my first babies were in college and my last baby was not a baby anymore was like a cold smack of reality right in the middle of my mother worrying, stress-lined face.   Friends, let m...

Laura Hull, LMFT Coping Coach   I borrowed part of the title of this blog from a song made popular by a famous group in the early 1990’s.   It was a contagious little ditty, if not blunt and to the point.   Songwriters throughout modern history have made a lot of money writing songs about broken hearts and broken dreams.   Alas, broken dreams are a common experience; perhaps even a common thread in the human experience that binds us together like a stadium wave, with lit smartphone flame in hand.   At one point or another, we all have ideas that are born in the form of a dream.   We invest ourselves, if not physically (or financially) at the very least emotionally, in the making of those dreams coming true.   I am a big believer in dreaming big.   I am also a big believer in having a “dream big, plan B” and a “dream big, plan C”.   I will explain why later.   Before I dive into the meat of this article, ...

  4 Ways to Survive (and Thrive) During the Kids’ Summer Break   By Laura Hull, LMFT  Coping Coach   As the mother of six children, (4 boys, two girls) ranging in age from 19-5, I frequently hear the bewildered comments of dumbfounded others who look at me like I have three heads when I mention that I have six children.   I always look forward to summer break with my kids, and experience a short period of mourning when the school year resumes in August.   If I had a dollar for every time someone has said to me over the years, “you must dread the summer break when all the kids are home at once,” I would have the money to write this blog from the sunny beaches on the south of France.   I love having my kids home for summer break.   However, there are reasons why it works.    Chaos is not allowed to reign and boredom is not allowed.    Not every minute of summer break needs to be structured, but time should n...

  By Laura Hull, LMFT   Back in the late 1980s, Bobby McFerrin had a smash hit song proclaiming the notion that when life throws everything including the kitchen sink at us, we should adopt the mindset of “don’t worry, be happy”.   Uh-huh.   This catchy little ditty puts a smile on the face, taking me in my mind to my worry-free, happy place (the one that exists only in my mind) where I am sitting on a beach, whistling along with Bobby under an umbrella with a fruity beverage.   Lost in that momentary thought, I am brought crashing back to reality with the sounds of real life.   My hubby and I have six kids to support…to put through college, to fit with braces, health issues to address, careers to pursue, and the list goes on and on.   With life comes worry.   Sorry Mr. McFerrin, your notion of “don’t worry, be happy” is a lovely one, but much easier said than done.   Everyone who lives long enough experiences worry and fea...

Brian M. Murray, MS What does it mean to be a combat veteran? Often the answer can be found in training and learning how to fight in a combat situation. A combat load in the military is regarded as a full load of everything needed to fight, whether it’s a tank or a rucksack. What goes in a tank or ruck gets hauled, whether it weighs 64 tons on a track or 120 pounds on a back. As prior Infantry, I remember my first real combat load and couldn’t believe what was being handed to me to carry. My usual training combat load varied anywhere from 35-75 pounds depending on the mission. Not this time. Before deploying, I weighed it in disbelief - it was approaching 120 lbs! By some standards and units this is still considered low. This is crazy; how can anyone carry this much weight and still be effective? It was cliché for the cadence call referencing “I used to drive a Cadillac, now I carry it on my back.” Point number one is that a combat load is heavy. It’s everything you need a...

Laura Hull, MA. LMFT Coping Coach     In 1995, the movie Apollo 13 was released, depicting the harrowing days of the Apollo 13 moon mission in April 1970.   In a scene midway through the movie, the astronauts are under immense stress from potential impending doom.   Fear and frustration begin to surface, finally climaxing with an explosive exchange between the men, each blaming the others in some way for the dire circumstances they were facing.   Of course, nothing about this exchange was helpful, productive or would change their circumstances in any way.   However, all the education and training in the world could not remove the very human emotions of anger, fear and frustration they experienced.    In a following scene, the commander of the mission abruptly cuts off the argument, without regard for whether all sides felt satisfied, and calmly radioed mission control.   The issue was not resolved - far from it - it was just ti...