The Lifeworks Group, Inc.

By Matt W. Sandford, LMHC How many of you have bought into it; that is, what the media represents sex to be? You know, they portray sex to be a wildly exciting and fun activity that you can do with anyone and that the more you do it the more exciting and fun it is. And, after that opening sentence, if you now expect that I am about to lecture you about the evils of sex, then I’ve got you right where I want you! Because remember – I’ve got a secret. And that secret is not that sex is evil or that everyone who is enjoying it needs to Stop Right Now! Sex isn’t bad or sinful. The problem isn’t that the media and the culture have made sex so prominent. The problem is that the media and the culture don’t know what sex is about and so they misrepresent its essence . And when you don’t understand the essence of a thing, like say using a fire hydrant to take a shower, then you undermine its value and you lose out on the blessing. You see, what I am saying is not that the culture loves...

By: Christine Hammond, LMHC Has your sex life changed after years of marriage?   Are y ou struggling with mismatched sex drives?   Sometimes the solution is right in front of you. Take a moment go over to lamp and unplug the cord from the electrical outlet.   Does the light go off?   Of course it does, now plug it back in.   The energy created between the connection of the outlet and the plug causes the light to go back on.   The outlet by itself cannot cause the light to go on any more than the plug by itself.   Both parts are needed to generate the electrical current. The plug fills an opening in the outlet just as the outlet receives the plug.   Sex works in the same manner: a husband fills his wife just as the wife receives her husband.   The connection between the two generates powerful energy and excitement.   But this energy and excitement is not just reserved for sex, it can be generated in everyday life as well. ...

By: Christine Hammond, LMHC Histrionic is defined as overly dramatic or emotional but as a personality trait histrionic includes overly sexual or provocative.   Interestingly enough a histrionic will see themselves as very sexual even when they are not sexually appealing or even physically attractive.   It is almost as if they have rose colored glasses on when they look in the mirror and then take them off when they look at others. So what is Histrionic?   Well, according to the new DSM-V, histrionic is no longer a personality disorder in and of itself rather it is now classified under Personality Disorder Trait Specified (PDTS).   This means that there was not enough research to properly classify histrionics as having a named personality disorder but there is evidence enough that it does exist.   So the traits of histrionics are still classifiable and qualify as a PDTS.   Here is the technical definition based on the new classification: · ...

By Chris Hammond, M.S. Ever wonder what the Bible says about sex?   It is filled with plenty of practical information about our daily lives including advice on love, money, wisdom, relationships, and work but what about sex?   Surprisingly, there are many verses about the matter and even an entire book called Song of Solomon written about it.   Yet not much is discussed in Christian circles about how God views sex.   There is much discussion about how other people view sex (just look at the titles of magazines at your grocery store), but few if any discuss how God views it. So after looking over many verses, it all comes down to a couple of basic ideas and here are the top sexual no-no’s in alphabetical order. Adultery is sex with someone who is not your spouse.   This commandment was given by God through the Ten Commandments in Exodus 20:14.   Jesus expanded the definition in Matt. 5:28 to include someone who looks at another ...

By Chris Hammond, MS, IMH One of the most frequently asked questions by couples preparing to get married are, “How much of my sexual past do I need to reveal to my partner?”   While this can be a difficult question to answer, there are some basic guidelines to follow. 1.        Don’t lie.   Starting off your marriage with a lie is not a strong foundation and sooner or later the truth will come out in the most horrible way.   Even though it might hurt your partner’s feelings or you might potentially lose them, it is far better to be honest and suffer the immediate consequences then it is to lie and live with life-long guilt and much worse consequences.   Remember a lie is not just speaking untruthfully; it is also withholding the truth. 2.        Disclose any health hazards.   Some states require that you disclose any sexually transmitted diseases or infections before they offer a marriage...

By Chris Hammond, MS It happens sometimes. You begin to notice that you are not interested in having sex with your husband as frequently as before or the thought of having sex at all is unappealing. Your sex drive seems to be decreasing and you are unsure as to why this is happening. There may not be any logical explanation at first but looking past the decreased sex drive to underlying issues may reveal one of the sources of the problems. Be honest. This is not a time to be silent with your husband. He needs to know that you are experiencing a decrease in your sex drive and perhaps not achieving an orgasm as frequently as before. Most likely he has already noticed (unless you are faking an orgasm which is lying) and is wondering what is wrong and if he is at fault. Check for any relational problems in your marriage such as difficulty with in-laws, finances, communication, or the kids. Getting help with these problems and dealing with them can improve your sex drive. Talk to y...

By Dwight Bain, Nationally Certified Counselor & Certified Life Coach Why do so many people lose love and sex while losing their marriage? Research shows many different factors that lead to relationship failure but let’s make it personal and explore some hidden reasons that move couples from ‘happy ever after’ to over to shattered dreams and hatred. Jessica and Phillip have been dating six months. They spend long nights together talking about how good things are for them. It feels like they have shared their entire life’s history with each other, so Phillip eventually asks Jessica to marry him. They feel so “in love”, that she instantly says “yes”! Soon they are off to see their pastor for premarital counseling. They discuss finances, children, careers, houses, and in-laws as they map out what it would be like as they begin their lifetime together. One summer day they stand before God and their friends in a little church to say “I do”. Ironically, less than a year later they were i...

Linda Riley, LMFT & Certified Sex Therapist The Greek philosopher, Sophocles said, “One word frees us of all the weight and pain of life. That word is love.” The Russian novelist, Fyodor Dostoevsky’s definition of hell is the “inability to love.” The apostle Paul says, “Without love we are nothing.” Life without love is an empty meaningless experience. God has designed us with both the need to give and to receive love. The capacity to love is a gift from God as love is a Divine energy. Our world seems to be moving, away from love for God and for others towards self-love. As a result of this shift, we are experiencing great difficulty creating healthy loving relationships, both emotionally and sexually. Love is what brings meaning and depth to sex. Helen Singer Kaplan says, “Love is the best aphrodisiac.” God designed sex to be an awesome experience; magical, mysterious, romantic and most of all passionate. It was intended to be a powerful means of unity and pleasure. But ou...