The Lifeworks Group, Inc.

By: Christine Hammond LMHC As soon as Tracey could get away, she ran. It took nearly all night to find the right moment when her date had finally fallen asleep enough to remove his arm off her body. She silently grabbed her clothes from around the room, putting on enough items to leave the apartment. Carefully, she opened the door and took off running in the opposite direction without a thought of where she was headed. After she got far enough away, she called a friend to pick her up and reluctantly phoned the police. Hours later, she went home with her friend. Once inside the familiar walls, she shrank into a ball on the floor, crying uncontrollably. The date which began well, ended in disaster, leaving Tracey shaken, broken, fearful, ashamed, disgusted, and traumatized. Her friend tried to comfort Tracey with a hug but she quickly withdrew and locked herself up in the bathroom. When she came out, her friend was patiently waiting and offered her support. ...

By: Christine Hammond, LMHC Divorcing a narcissist is grueling because they refuse to be on the receiving end of someone leaving them. Their superior narcissistic ego will not allow the possibility that there might be something wrong with them. So they try numerous push away abusive tactics followed by pull closer romantic methods to keep the spouse from separating. But, in contrast, if the narcissist decides to go then there is no stopping them. Due to the exhausting nature of divorce, it takes careful planning on how a spouse goes about the divorce. Done well, the process will be much easier and met with far less resistance. Follow these steps before confronting a narcissist. 1.        Recognize ending. There will be a point where enough is enough. Decide ahead of time what the boundary is and then have the courage to stick to it. For instance, a limitation could be multiple affairs. Once the second affair is discovered, consider this the poin...

By: Christine Hammond, LMHC How much different would life be if exhaustion wasn’t a factor? It is normal to be physically overwhelmed from long hours at work, ungrateful children, overload of electronic stimulus, and tiresome relatives. But some exhaustion is much deeper. It stems from unmet needs, expectations, ambitions, and hopes. It is compounded by tragedies, disappointments, rejections, and harsh realities. And it encompasses nearly every aspect of life without prejudice. So this year, instead of adding one more thing to an overburdened schedule, how about eliminating exhaustion?  To make this task even more manageable, try focusing on just one item per month. Most habits are set within 30 days so incorporating a new concept each month can make this year considerably better. 1.        January: Plan. Start off the year on a good note by calendared all major events for the year. There are several very good on-line calendars and apps th...

Identifying Emotional Warning Signs and Trauma Symptoms A community crisis can terrorize an entire community in just a few minutes, while the recovery process to rebuild from a major critical incident may take weeks or months to sort through. The more you know about how to survive and rebuild after the crisis, the faster you can take positive action to get your personal and professional life back on track. Since community crisis events like school, mall or church shootings, bombing or terrorism are unpredictable, it requires a different course of action from natural disasters like hurricanes, tornadoes, earthquakes, fires and floods. What can you do right now to cope with the psychological impact of a major community crisis brought on through violence? 1. Deal Directly with Your Emotions This will reduce the tension and stress on you, which allows you to have more energy to deal with a difficult situation. However, if you stuff your fears and frustrations in a major commun...

  By: Dwight Bain, LMHC, NCC   Feeling Stressed Out? You are not alone. In fact, families are more stressed, more pressured and more exhausted than ever before. The problem is that stress usually brings out the worst in our lives, making already complex situations overwhelming or worse, shouting matches to prove who is ‘right.’   Is there a better way? I believe there is and it involves moving from focusing on the stress, (or source of the stress), to focus on managing it successfully. Here are some rapid strategies to use to make your home a place of happy memories and peace, instead of a panic filled environment where everyone is ducking for cover. 1.      Speak up instead of Stuff it.   Often we follow the simplistic advice of Thumper’s father in the Disney film, “Bambi” who has the classic line, “If you can’t say something nice, don’t say nothing at all.” However, remember this was a young rabbit quoting his cart...

By: Brian M Murray, MS One of the hallmarks of a great marriage or relationship is being involved with a person who values the other person’s feelings in a respectful and caring way. Validation in a relationship is kind of like a relationship health check. It is the ability to communicate thoughts and feelings that are accepted by the other person. Healthy relationships do not criticize or belittle the other person for expressing their feelings. Whether intentional or not, being critical or belittling the other person can send signals that what is being expressed implies the other is wrong, or somehow it makes them a bad person. Invalidation is negative behavior that can and often turns the overall mood of the relationship sour. The initial gut response to the negativity is often anger and resentment. The anger and resentment are the result of feeling the pain of the invalidating comment. Emotional support is very important as it validates each other’s feelings by commu...

By: Matt W. Sandford, LMHC What is self care? Self care means attending to your self – increasing and/or maintaining your personal emotional well being. An objection to self care that I’ve heard people say is that it seems self indulgent. This objection is commonly rooted in the Christian understanding that our calling is to serve and focus on others. There are, in fact, scriptures that seem at first to be in support of this viewpoint. “For even the Son of Man did not come to be serve d, but to serve , and to give his life as a ransom for many.” Mark 10:45 “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, 4  not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others.” Phil 2:3-4 There are actually plenty of passages we could reference to support this idea. But I want to consider a few other passages to help us to gain balance as to the intention of the passages on serving. “Whatever y...