10 Worst Things You Can Say to a Highly Sensitive Person
By: Christine Hammond, LMHC
Highly
sensitive people (HSP) are so aware of their surroundings that even the
slightest change in mood, tone, or temperature is noted. They have a unique
ability to sense the emotions of others, absorb the feelings, empathize deeply,
and are keenly aware of how to make things better.
As
natural perfectionists, not for the benefit of others but for themselves, they
try hard not to make mistakes. They are intense thinkers and feelers,
conscientious, easily overwhelmed, hyper-sensitive to smells and tastes, and
need to withdraw to regroup. Many HSPs will say that they literally cannot live
without the arts or music.
If you
know of someone who fits this profile, there are ten things which cause an
immediate negative reaction in a HSP.
1.
“You need to go faster.” HSPs
have a difficult time doing things at a fast pace and reminding them of this
will most likely result in them going even slower.
2.
“It’s not that big of a deal.”
Because a HSP is highly aware of circumstances, moods, and senses, they can see
that something will become a big deal before it is even on the radar of others.
3.
“I know how you feel.” You do
not know how they feel. They feel
things so intensely compared to others that it is not possible to compare
levels of feelings.
4.
“You are too emotional.” They
are naturally emotional and the only way to cut back on feelings is for them to
completely shut-down. This is not productive in the end.
5.
“It doesn’t have to be perfect.” It
might not have to be perfect for others, but it does have to be perfect for
them. Perfectionism is their way of showing how much they care about something.
6.
“That smell is not that strong.” HSPs
are particularly sensitive to perfumes and food smells. When they say a smell
is making them gag, it really is. They are not being dramatic.
7.
“Why does it take you so long to eat?” Cooking
and eating are events for a HSP. They like to savor their food and sometimes
take tiny bits to drag out the process longer.
8.
“Really, you need another break?” Yes,
they do. Because they take in more information through their five senses than
others, they often need to take a break to decompress.
9.
“You make things more difficult than they
need to be.” From the HSP point of view, others
over-simplify things that should be thought through more thoroughly.
10.
“You think too much.” They
already know that they think too much but are unable to turn off their brain.
This is why sleep seems to elude some of them.