Struggling With Parenting? Cautious Parents are Aware
By Chris Hammond
“Failing to plan is planning to fail.” This is one of your favorite quotes and your
child already knows it by heart. You are
a careful planner in every activity with many detailed lists in order by
priority and usually color coded for easy reference. This is responsible behavior and
irresponsible behavior is not having a plan because danger lurks behind every
corner and you might be unprepared. It is important that you set the proper
example for your child in behavior, thought, and control of your emotions so
you are very careful about what you say, how you say it and explaining why you
do what you do.
You are a Cautious
Parent. As a cautious parent, your
favorite questions will be centered around the word “Why”. Why did you do that? Why didn’t you finish that? Why aren’t you doing it this way? Cautious parents are detail oriented,
analytical, and perfectionists but when pushed they can become irrationally
moody and over explain. If your child is
like you, they will ask a ton of “why” questions and be thrilled that you take
the time to respond.
The Good. There is reason and logic behind every
decision and you are more than willing to explain how you came to the
conclusions that you did. You love to
share your knowledge of the world in detail and could go on and on about one
topic for hours. Your child enjoys
having their own personal “Encyclopedia” who is very resourceful and can cut
research time down to a matter of minutes.
Unfortunately, most schools don’t accept “Dad” or “Mom” on the works
cited page.
The Bad. You have a desire to share your wisdom with
your child but too much information at the wrong time can do more damage than
good. Over explaining things does not
equip your child to reason through things for themselves and frequently your
child will be lacking in critical thinking skills as they have learned to just
trust your judgment rather than figure it out for themselves.
The Ugly. As an adult, if your child is still relying
on your wisdom to guide their life, they will continue to flounder at nearly
every job they do. Still looking for
someone to spell out every detail so they don’t have to think for themselves
and risk making a mistake, your child will find comfort in menial employment instead
of living up their full potential.
Understanding your parenting style is not about beating
yourself up and or pointing fingers at your spouse. Rather it is about understanding your natural
strengths and weaknesses so you can build on the strengths and minimize the
weaknesses. Remember, cautious parents
are aware so be aware and minimize the over explaining.
