The Four Biggest Barriers to a Social Life
By: Nate Webster, IMH
Even up until 50 years ago, people lived in a
very different world than today. In just 5 decades we’ve seen the invention of
digital technology, the Internet and really fast transportation! However, some
of our advances as a society have become our biggest barriers to a thriving
social life. Below is a list what may be the four biggest barriers to your
social life. Read them through and see which ones fit.
Doing everything online: Shopping, taking piano
lessons, school and even counseling can be done online. There is a great
temptation to live our entire lives online. It feels more convenient and gives
us a sense of efficiency, but forfeits human interaction that allows for
relationships and community. What’s one activity you do online that maybe you
can start doing in person? Is loneliness really worth all the efficiency and
convenience of online living?
Everything’s about
productivity:
It’s true that you may work in an office that needs productivity all the time,
however that doesn’t mean the rest of your life needs that also. In fact,
trying to always lead a productive social life can leave you feeling stressed
and even resentful. It can make time with family and friends feel like work.
However, learning to release yourself from the pressures of productivity is a
great stress-reducer! What would it be like to hang out with friends and family
without a “purpose” other than enjoying their company?
We’re always distracted: I bought a painting
last year called “Thought Plagued by a Spirit of Distraction”, as it captures
perfectly a person trying to think, but something keeps interrupting them. So
many of us are honestly so distracted that it makes friendship impossible. How
often do we check our cellphones while we are with another friend? Why do we
keep using our laptops in class and meetings if we are only ever on Facebook?
It’s important to remember that we are victims of the things that distract us
from a social life, and with some self-control we can become more engaged in
the relationships we want.
Our Transient Society:
The Bureau of Labor Statistics reports that most individuals will have 10 jobs
before age 40 and that the latest generation will have upwards of 15. Likewise,
the Census Bureau indicates that individuals move residences roughly 11 times throughout
their life. With so much movement of our jobs and housing it can make it
incredibly difficult to have lasting friendships. If you want some closer
friendships, I suggest committing to the things in your life that you usually
are always quickly moving on from. Even a small dose of commitment can create
so much more intimacy in the friendships you’d like to have.
If
you’ve identified these barriers in your social life and would like some help
in getting over them, getting a therapist is a great place to start. Visit our
office website at LifeWorksGroup.Org or call us directly at 407-647-7005.
To schedule an appointment with Nate Webster, please call our office at 407-647-7005.
