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Showing posts from May, 2016

Five Things to do Today When in a Relationship with a Narcissist

By: Christine Hammond, LMHC It’s hard to avoid narcissists. They seem to be everywhere, multiplying in great numbers. It reminds me of the old Star Trek episode with the Tribbles who reproduced at such a rapid rate that the ship was in danger of being overtaken in a matter of days. At first the Tribbles were cute to watch but then they became threatening. And so it is with narcissism. What can a person do to counteract this perilous environment? Here are five things a person can do today: 1.        Guard self-talk. The innately persistent and persuasive nature of a narcissist allows them to effortlessly influence others. Unfortunately, some of the narcissistic talk is negative attacks designed to intimidate others into an inferior position to their superior one. a.       Solution: To counteract the effects, a person must guard their self-talk especially if it mirrors anything the narcissist has declared about the person. Of every negative thought, ask: “Where did this com

Want to be better equipped to help when your organization or community is impacted by Crisis? Gain the valuable next level of Crisis Certification!

When UCLA went on " Lock-Down"  last week after the school shooting, only certified first responders could help at the scene.. Tropical Storm Colin packed 50mph winds which sparked tornado warnings and flooding throughout the night, but only certified first responders are able to psychologically debrief storm survivors. The brutal slaying on Monday of First Baptist Church of Orlando Sunday-School teacher Linda Jones by a fellow church-member was tragic, (  http://www.orlandosentinel.com/news/breaking-news/os-jason-rohrer-murder-orlando-20160601-story.html  ), but only certified first responders were able to lead crisis debriefing sessions. The world is getting more dangerous. Are you Certified First Responder Ready?   Counselors, Nurses, Pastors, Teachers, Doctors, EMT's, Law Enforcement, Firefighters and Concerned Citizens are able to attend this training, which is the only one scheduled in Central Florida until October. Don't miss out on an op

Difference between Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder and Obsessive Compulsive Disorder

By: Christine Hammond, LMHC It is amazing the difference one word can make. Add the word “Personality” to Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) and it changes the definition and classification. There are some similarities such as obsessive and compulsive traits, thoughts and actions. However the underlying disorder is extremely different. Here is the DSM-V definition of both: Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder (OCPD) is classified as a type of personality disorder: A pervasive pattern of preoccupation with orderliness, perfectionism, and mental and interpersonal control, at the expense of flexibility, openness, and efficiency, beginning by early adulthood and present in a variety of contexts, as indicated by four (or more) of the following: Is preoccupied with details, rules, lists, order, organization, or schedules to the extent that the major point of the activity is lost Shows perfectionism that interferes with task completion (e.g., is unable to complete a

Keeping Your In-Laws Out of Your Marriage

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By: Nate Webster, IMH “ So what will you do if you or her gets cancer or something and you have all these medical bills ”, was the first question my father in-law asked me when I asked for his daughter’s hand in marriage. It’s no mystery to most people that in-laws can be a downer, complicated bunch. We marry a person we love, but along with it we get a family who is often very different then what we’re use to. They don’t talk around the dinner table like we do, they don’t like the same things we do, and typically our boundaries and rules are usually just seen as suggestions and recommendations. So what do you do with difficult in-laws? Well fortunately the bible has some very timely advice for dealing with such in-laws and hopefully it can help you! "Do not give dogs what is sacred; do not throw your pearls to pigs. If you do, they may trample them under their feet, and turn and tear you to pieces.” Matthew 7:6 The principle of pearls and pigs: How many of us hav

The Frustration of Dealing with Narcissistic In-Laws

By: Christine Hammond, LMHC Hold on tight and get ready for a roller-coaster of a ride when marrying into a narcissistic family. At first the Narcissistic Parent (NP) will seem amazingly charming and the concerns the Adult Child (AC) expresses appear to be exaggerations.  But give it some time and everything will change overnight. Here are some points to keep in mind when dealing with NPs: It all begins with an engagement . Casual dating is not that threating to the NP because they have established a tell-all philosophy in the home. This gives the NP time to weave their “concerns” about the potential new spouse, spread untruthful rumors, and re-introduce the AC to previously approved (because they are easily manipulated and controlled) partners. But once the engagement is announced, the war begins. Suddenly this new spouse is an inadequate, unsuitable, and unacceptable addition who will destroy their AC.  The NP projects their unhealthy motives, lack of boundaries, and control

The Narcissistic Family: A Narcissist, an Exhausted Spouse, and an Anxious Child

By: Christine Hammond, LMHC The level of stress surrounding a narcissistic family is intense from the inside and picture perfect from the outside. As a member of the family (narcissists excluded), there is a constant state of walking on eggshells, questioning what did or did not happen, and minimizing personal feelings while elevating the narcissist’s feelings. From the outside looking in, the family seems to function perfectly in-tune and any hint of issue is immediately discounted. The extreme divide between the two existences is rarely addressed and almost always is denied. This leaves the family in a continual state of uncertainty, insecurity, depression, and fear. But the narcissist won’t hear of any such negativity and most definitely won’t accept any responsibility for the issues. Any attempt to reach an outsider is quickly met with further alienation from the narcissist, accusations of betrayal, or gaslighting. So what can a person in such a family do? It must begin by t