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Showing posts from June, 2009

An Undisputed Advantage

By Ron White, Coach & Best-Selling Author Sometimes success in life is a result of setting yourself apart from your competition or simply everyone else. There is one behavior that, without a doubt, will give you an advantage over those around you. I will allow Thomas Jefferson to share what that is. He once said, "Nothing gives one person so much advantage over another as to remain always cool and unruffled under all circumstances." Have you ever been in a stressful situation or in a storm of life in which you were not able to maintain your cool? It happens to all of us. Billy Joel puts it this way in his hit song "Pressure": But you will come to a placeWhere the only thing you feelAre loaded guns in your faceAnd you'll have to deal with Pressure Jefferson and Joel are in agreement that you will have to handle pressure. Jefferson suggests that how you respond to that pressure can give you a distinct advantage over those around you. Accepting the fact that

When should you get help for your marriage?

A LifeWorks Group Counseling Checklist These are the most common factors that can lead to marital crisis. As you read through this list, think about your relationship or the relationship of your friends and co-workers and then focus on the importance of working through issues now to find peace and connection instead of growing distance and eventual divorce. ___When children become the exclusive focus of the marriage ___When one marriage partner dominates or controls the other ___When blaming, shouting, sarcasm or threats become commonplace ___When drugs or alcohol abuse is an issue ___When physical or sexual abuse occurs ___When sexual or financial issues are ignored or are a constant battleground ___When trust is violated over money, morality or unexplained absences ___When affection and kindness to each other ceases ___When outside factors (job stress, child issues, financial crisis) increase ___When it is easier to discuss feelings with someone of the opposite sex other than your m

What are the psychological dynamics behind women and worry?

By Dwight Bain, Nationally Certified Counselor & Life Coach Women worry about many different topics, from men to body image to relationships to their mother's approval; yet the same psychological drive is fueling this stressful emotion no matter what triggers it. I believe the real source behind the worry most women feel is control. Not control in the sense of being a manipulative monster, (like Jane Fonda's character in the film "Monster in Law), rather it's the need to know what's happening around her so she can feel empowered and in control of her emotions and environment. Think of it this way. When control goes up, worry goes down because the more a woman can understand the more she will automatically feel a sense of security and confidence inside. However, as a situation begins to feel out of control, worry dramatically increases, leading to more serious conditions like Social Phobia, Generalized Anxiety Disorders or even Panic Attacks if left untreated

Frozen by the Fear of Wrong Decisions

By Dwight Bain, Nationally Certified Counselor and Certified Life Coach One of my favorite sayings to share with people facing a major decision is "you always have options." Yet in challenging times people are often so frozen by fear from making a wrong decision that they don't make a decision at all and life passes them by. Think of how many events in life are complicated or missed completely because of the roadblock of being afraid to fail by making a decision and then making that decision work… Marriages that didn't happen because of a shy guy with cold feet Promotions that never occurred because of the fear of asking for it Scholarships left on a table somewhere because someone was afraid to fill out the paperwork Trips to exotic places that were always talked about but never taken because no one sat down to schedule it Relationships that failed because someone didn't decide to work on issues and quietly let things 'slip, slide away' Forgiveness that w

Labor That Works Miracles

by Jim Rohn, Master Coach & Mentor Two thousand years ago on April 15th one of Jesus' disciples came to him and said it was time to pay taxes (that's how I know it was around April 15th), but they had no money. In response to his disciple's statement, Jesus said "no problem." Now why could he say "no problem"? Well, word had it that Jesus was a miracle worker. If you hand a problem to a miracle worker, what they are inclined to say is "no problem." You've got to hang out with people like that. I belong to a small group and we do business around the world. These guys are all miracle workers. What an incredible group. If you hand any of them a problem, guess what they say, "no problem." How many books will they read to solve a problem? As many as it takes. If they need to consult, how much consulting will they do? As much as it takes. How early will they get up? As early as it takes. "No problem"... you got to hang out

Will God Love Me if I have a Low Credit Score?

By Dwight Bain, Nationally Certified Counselor & Life Coach Someone asked me this question recently, “Will God love me if I have a low credit score?” I couldn’t believe it! They were under so much pressure to be financially perfect they made the wrong connection between having limited financial resources and experiencing spiritual abundance. Your worth as a human being isn’t based on the amount of stuff you have or how you may appear to have it all together on the outside. The Bible says that God loves you, just because it’s you. Not because of wealth, good looks, a big house or great job. You don’t have to be perfect to experience God’s love, but you do have to reach out in dependence knowing that you need a relationship with Him. Prideful, independent people who push through life don’t stop to recognize their need for God until they are facing some type of crisis, (and in the crisis it’s always easier to reach out for God’s help). So the answer to the question is Yes, Yes, Ye