Marital Factors which can lead to Marital Failure

Financial & Career
Conflict over spending issues (unresolved spending conflict can linger for years)
Excessive debt (credit cards, late payments, IRS, low FICO, student loans…)
Excessive lifestyle (house, cars, entertainment, travel, recreational vehicles…)
Business success or failure (especially with family or home based business)
Inability to maintain stable employment (or seek job training to increase options)
Lack of income or feeling used financially by spouse who doesn’t contribute
Excessive business travel or weekend work that prevents relationship time
Workaholic or exhausted from the driven need to accomplish greater success
Married to their job instead of to their marriage partner

Emotional
Anger issues (sarcasm, resentment, criticism, bitterness, passive-aggressive, etc.)
Rage, violent temper or episodes of violence (including unresolved past fights)
Stress or burnout (including chronic physical problems or stress related disorders)
Suffocating emotions (jealousy, low self-esteem, insecurity, codependency, etc.)
Substance abuse (alcohol, drugs, prescription medication, eating disorders, etc.)
Gambling, pornography or other addictive and secretive behaviors
Criminal behavior, illegal activity or forcing spouse to participate in any unethical acts
Immaturity, ego or selfishness, including the compulsive need to always be ‘right’ or win
Loneliness, rejection, phobic disorders or social isolation disconnected from family or friends
Mental, psychological or psychiatric problems or failure to seek professional help for these issues
Violation of treatment plan or meds to regain emotional stability (e.g. ADD, bi-polar, OCD)
TV addiction to escape reality (soaps, sports, sitcoms, shopping, news, movies, etc.)
Internet addiction to avoid relationship (chat rooms, IM, virtual relationships, email pals, etc.)
Video or computer games to escape reality and relationships (role playing games, online gaming)

Relational
Communication problems, misunderstandings, total silence or failure to listen
Intimacy problems, sexual frustration, sexual distance or lack of sexual desire
Emotional affair or continual flirting for attention from the opposite sex
Sexual behavior with another person outside of the marriage relationship
Sexual behavior with a fantasy image or virtual relationship (sexual addictions)
Unrealistic expectations of marital role or marital responsibilities for each partner
Power & manipulation (or controlling behavior with spouse, children, family or others)
Abuse (emotional, verbal, physical, sexual or threat of abuse with spouse or children)
In-law interference or extreme conflict and dysfunction from extended family system
Abusiveness toward pets or other people especially if threats of a weapon are involved
Parenting struggles (child management, blended family issues, absent or controlling parent)
Household management of chores & clutter or the failure to respect the time & schedule of others
Unresolved legal conflicts (past support or custody issues, business disputes…)
Feeling overwhelmed & exhausted from trying to make the marriage work alone

Spiritual
Religious differences or lack of worship together through a shared house of faith
Dishonesty, lying, misrepresentation, half-truth, ethical violations or other breeches of integrity
Attacking, disrespectful, disloyal, rude or hateful toward other faiths, cultures and belief systems
Not living consistent with personal values and morality or failure to work on character flaws
Trust violations, since trust is the foundational element for any successful relationship

Developed by Dwight Bain, Author, Nationally Certified Counselor & Certified Family Law Mediator
(permission to reprint providing you leave contact information- 407-647-7005) www.LifeWorksGroup.org

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