What’s Love got to do with it?

What’s Love got to do with it?
Understanding the real meaning of love


By Dwight Bain, Nationally Certified Counselor & Certified Life Coach

“What is Love?” I overheard a little girl ask her father at the table next to me at a local restaurant. He stammered and tried to explain that it was a good feeling that you have for someone that you care about. “But what if you feel bad?” she said. The dad stammered again and didn’t do a very good job of explaining this basic emotion that we all have experienced. Then it dawned on me. Could I do a better job? Nope. The question is a tough one. What is this thing we call love? Pop singer Tina Turner explained it this way, “what’s love got to do with it? What’s love, but a second hand emotion.” The 1980’s rocker Huey Lewis sang about the “power of love,” but didn’t explain what it was. So what is it?

Culture defines love as a romantic, “warm-fuzzy” emotion that you can have during a “chick-flick” or toward the New York Yankees, pizza, your dog, or spouse! Go figure. I have often thought that the urgency for candy, cards and flowers this time of year is brought to us mostly from those that sell candy, cards and flowers; rather than from the need to display on-going affection from small tokens of appreciation day after day. What type of chemistry would draw total strangers together to make a lifetime commitment? Does it even exist anymore?

The type of romantic love displayed in “Sleepless in Seattle,” doesn’t seem to work for most people. Yet, we watch those movies with a sense of anticipation that the “perfect guy” will indeed meet the “perfect woman” and they will live happily ever after. In real life Meg Ryan likely would not have ever met Tom Hanks in New York, much less on Valentine’s Day at the top of the Empire State Building. It just doesn’t work out that way- except in the movies. So we are back to the issue; what is love?

St. John said that “God is love”. St. Paul said that love was “patient, kind, gentle, and would never fail.” Jesus said that there was no greater love that you could show for another than to lay down your life in death for them. This is the emotion that drove a loving God to allow His only Son to die in our place. This is an emotion that should be studied, modeled and then lived out.

Dwight Moody was a pastor in Chicago over 100 years ago and said it this way- “I never knew up to that time that God loved us so much. This heart of mine began to thaw out; I could not keep back the tears. I just drank it in... I tell you there is one thing that draws above everything else in the world ad that is love.”

I wish I had another chance to talk to the little girl and her dad about love; to share the greatest love story ever told. “Jesus loves me, this I know, for the Bible tells me so.” If you are feeling lonely, empty and unloved today; why not allow the One that would rather die, than live without you to enter in? He is Love. He is there. He quietly waits for you.

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About the Author: Dwight Bain is a Nationally Certified Counselor & Certified Family Law Mediator in practice since 1984 with a primary focus on solving crisis events and managing major change. Critical Incident Stress Management expert with the Orange County Sheriffs Office, founder of StormStress.com and trainer for over 1,500 business groups on the topic of making strategic change to overcome major stress- both personally & professionally. He is a professional member of the National Speakers Association and partners with corporations and organizations to make a positive difference in our culture. Access more complimentary counseling and coaching resources from The LifeWorks Group by visiting their extensive posting of blog’s and special reports designed to save you time by strategically solving problems at www.LifeWorksGroup.org

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