Personalities: Do You Know Someone who is Super Sensitive?
By Chris Hammond, MS, IMH
Sensitive Suzie comes home sulking desperately wanting to
head straight for her room after a long day of managing everyone else’s
problems. She is exhausted from all of
the confrontation and just wants to escape to her own little cocoon but knows
that her family needs her so she puts off her alone time till later. “Why can’t everyone just get along?” she
says, “Life would be so much simpler if everyone just worked together instead
of fighting all the time.” But the
distraction of her family manages to put a smile on her face and soon she
decides that she really doesn’t need the alone time after all, just a few hugs
and kisses from her kids do the trick.
However the frustration builds inside and while Suzie ignores it, the
kids begin fighting over the last piece of garlic bread. Before long she finds herself exploding over
the garlic bread while her family looks at this unknown person who never seems
to get upset over anything. Knowing she
has disappointed her family Suzie turns her anger inward to an even greater
sense of insecurity and inadequacy.
Sound familiar? If so, then your someone is an “S” in the
DISC personality profile which is “Steadfast”.
Their motto in life is to “Keep the peace” and for them having a calm
atmosphere at all times in all circumstances is the most important element. They are the most sensitive of the bunch and
can perceive things that others just overlook so they make excellent
negotiators, mediators, and parents.
Slow, steady, straight, and calm are the ways they approach nearly every
new circumstance and certainly every conflict.
For them, the only way to handle a problem is to deal with it calmly;
otherwise, they run from all aggressive attacks and retreat into their safe
shell of isolation. They accomplish all
kinds of work done without any complaining, arguing, debating, changing the
method, or asking for other’s input.
Instead they just do the job well, quietly, and without rocking the
boat.
As a Spouse. They will dutifully do what is expected
without being asked and will take pride in a house well run without any
conflict. But that is the key; there can
be no conflict because if there is, they have failed in their mission to keep the
peace. You see, they work so hard to
keep everything on an even level that if it is not, they take it personally and
blame themselves for the failure. There
is no point in accepting responsibility for the failure as they will not hear a
word, the only way to resolve the issue is to calm down and reduce the conflict. They will remain calm most all of the time
but watch out, if pushed too far, they will explode like a volcano and then
hate themselves for causing the conflict propelling them to retreat.
As a Friend. They are the most loyal and faithful friends
you could possibly imagine who will always get you the perfect gift because
they have put a ton of time and thought behind it. This is how they demonstrate to you their
dedication to your friendship and no matter how many years may have passed they
will happily restore the friendship to the same level it was before. But if you betray them, be warned because
they do not tolerate any disloyalty and will cut you out of their life if
needed to protect themselves or the people they love. They can become very self-protected when
attacked and sometimes this looks a lot like selfishness.
As a Co-Worker. Who can ask for a better co-worker as they
will make the office run smoothly without a hitch no matter what level of
stressful situations are looming over the horizon. They are wonderful organizers, do things
without being asked, finish other’s tasks without complaining, and maintain a
good attitude. But if they feel for one
second that you don’t appreciate them or value them, they will quit without
notice and leave you hanging. To keep
them happy, don’t recognize them in public as they will hate any attention
being drawn to them but rather give them a bonus, privilege or gift as this is
of far greater value then public recognition or a title.
As a Child. They are the quiet ones who do everything the
teacher asks and are usually the favorite friend, student, or even sibling
amongst the competition. But don’t tell
them it is a competition or they will run the opposite direction as they don’t
want anyone to feel left out or a loser.
They are not likely to enjoy winning for the sake of beating someone
else up but rather they enjoy winning to know they have outdone
themselves. While on the surface they
may seem organized, buried deep in their drawers or under their bed is a huge
mess they are hiding from everyone. If
you publically announce it, they will never forgive you but if you privately
address the matter, they will correct it.
This personality becomes incredible diplomats, mediators,
office managers, human resources, and administrators. They have enough detail skills to work with
overly detail-oriented personalities without getting obsessive about it and
enough people skills to work with overly friendly personalities without failing
to complete a task, but they have no tolerance for the overly aggressive
personality as they will see them as a bully.
So the next time you come across a Sensitive Suzy, handle them with care
and they will care well for you but handle them with force and they will bite
back.
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"Reprinted with permission from the LifeWorks Group weekly eNews, (Copyright, 2004-2012), To subscribe to this valuable counseling and coaching resource visit www.LifeWorksGroup.org or call 407-647-7005"
About the author- Chris Hammond is a Registered Mental Health Counselor Intern at LifeWorks Group w/ over 15 years of experience as a counselor, mentor & teacher for children, teenagers & adults.
"Reprinted with permission from the LifeWorks Group weekly eNews, (Copyright, 2004-2012), To subscribe to this valuable counseling and coaching resource visit www.LifeWorksGroup.org or call 407-647-7005"
About the author- Chris Hammond is a Registered Mental Health Counselor Intern at LifeWorks Group w/ over 15 years of experience as a counselor, mentor & teacher for children, teenagers & adults.