The Lifeworks Group, Inc.

By: Brian Murray, LMHC, NCC Codependency is a word that was born out of the addiction field of therapy. It’s a description that is used for a person who is involved with a person who has substance abuse problems. The codependent has an addiction as well. They are addicted to love. There are many traits and characteristics of a codependent that can be sub-categorized under the big 3 discussed here. These are the fixer, the controller and the apathetic. In addiction they may also be accused of being an enabler or a rescuer. Codependents provide resources to the addicted person hoping they will get love in return. And hope is the key word, they hold out for the hope of getting love if they just prove how wonderful they are to the addicted person. This creates a double bind in the relationship, henceforth, the codependent and the dependent. Usually it takes years before the codependent realizes they will never get the love they seek. Or, the codependent notices a behavioral reinforceme...

 By: Brian Murray, LMHC, NCC Couples go to relationship or marriage counseling to resolve problems to improve their relationship with each other. A host of problems can arise during a marriage anywhere from poor communication to infidelity. Marriage and a committed relationship require dedication and at times can be hard work for the relationship to feel good. However, sometimes relationships can be painful leading to a sense of dissatisfaction. Counseling can be helpful for clients who are facing divorce. But helpful does not always equal success. If the counseling office is the last-ditch effort to save the marriage, then counseling can feel like it’s already at a loss before it even begins. This can put a lot of pressure on the counselor who is faced with a difficult position to help save a failing marriage. If counseling does not work, then it’s divorce.    Couples who went to counseling on the way to divorce court frequently feel like counseling was a failu...