The Lifeworks Group, Inc.

  By: Dwight Bain, LMHC A recent USA Today poll asked this question, “Which best fits your holiday emotional state?” Relaxed   - 18% Joyful   - 31% Stressed -   27% Depressed -   24% Why do people feel so overloaded with additional problems during the holidays? I believe the majority of the pressure they feel is from trying to live up to unrealistic expectations of creating a ‘perfect’ Christmas. Remember Clark W. Griswald from the movie ‘Christmas Vacation?’ He is the laughable, but best illustration of a guy who tries to do everything right, only to have literally everything go wrong. Dysfunctional relatives, one blown bulb derailing all of the decorations, the Christmas tree goes up in flames, the turkey is dry, the check for the swimming pool is going to bounce, add in a crazy cousin kidnapping the hateful boss, while the dog destroys the house chasing a rabid s...

By: Christine Hammond LMHC Remember when then President Bill Clinton defended his improper relationship with Monica Lewinsky by saying, “it depends on what your definition of ‘is’ is”? That classic line sounds almost ridiculous as there is only one meaning to the word is. It stands to reason that other simple words such as ‘yes’ and ‘no’ would likewise have only one meaning. However, to some people, ‘no’ does not mean no. A teenager hears the word ‘no’ after asking to borrow the car. Instead of accepting the response, the teen insists that the world is coming to an end if they cannot meet their friends later that night. A spouse hears the word ‘no’ after asking to have sex with their partner. Rather than respecting the response, there is constant trying, begging, manipulation, and finally coercion. A boss hears the word ‘no’ after asking their employee to stay late one night without any additional pay. As the employee goes to leave, the boss threatens to hire s...

By: Christine Hammond, LMHC When adults realize they were the product of a narcissistic parent, it can shock them into a state of grief. Instantly, they go from idealizing the narcissist to grieving their lost childhood and the God-like image of their parent. Suddenly, the parent is transformed from larger than life to a deeply insecure human being. With the rose colored glasses off, the adult struggles to rewrite their history without a narcissistic perception. It is not an easy process. It requires time to recall events and alter them to a newly discovered reality. It entails massive energy to reprogram the negative words and competitive actions of the narcissist. It necessitates motivation to complete the process until a new level of healthy is achieved. But now that this process is finished, what new boundaries can keep the adult from falling back into old habits? 1.       Think before speaking . Before visiting or speaking to a narcissistic paren...