The Lifeworks Group, Inc.

By: Christine Hammond LMHC Sam saw a pattern. After her narcissistic husband would explode combining verbal assaults with mental and emotional abuse, he seemed calmer for several weeks. Then, as if there was a timer set on his frustration tolerance, one minute comment could spark the abusive rage again. The rages were awful. He would call her names, twist the truth, throw things at her, exaggerate her intentions, guilt-trip her into believing this rage was her fault, and even physically block her so she couldn’t leave the room. Unlike other non-narcissistic abusive people, her husband would not take any responsibility for his actions. He refused to apologize and instead made a game out of getting her to apologize for his poor behavior. Sam accepted the guilt just to keep the peace and it would work for about six weeks. During this time, he was charming, pleasant, and would give her material gifts almost as if this was the only way he could say sorry. But then the...

By: Emily Long Taylor Swift said it perfectly in a song: “you got that James Dean daydream look in your eye…” when it comes to describing bad boys. Your friends have dated them, you’ve dated them, your mom, sister, cousin… every woman you encounter has experienced a “bad boy” at one point or another. How can you spot the “bad boys” and identify them? You can’t. They don’t walk around wearing signs of indication, dress a certain way or hang out in a particular area. They just are. When your friends or family date them you can normally spot them more quickly than Waldo in a Where’s Waldo book. But when you’re dating a “bad boy” everything isn’t so crystal clear.  Categories of “Bad Boys” When someone thinks of the bad boy image, their perception is all based on experience. Why? Shouldn’t a bad boy be obvious? Bad boys can earn their classification by their charm. They could be perfectly groomed in an Armani suit and know the exact words to say to a female to win her over....

By: Cara Griffin-Locker, IMH Why do good girls often flock to bad boys? Well, they are fun, adventurous, familiar and more often than not they need to be fixed.  What girl does not like a little project?  As women we tend to want to fix things and that may include the man in our life. How can a good girl avoid dating a bad boy? The answer lies in understanding herself as a woman, having expectations of what she wants in a man and being able to identify her value. A girl’s desire for the perfect man can lead to a fixation on finding a boyfriend. Having a boyfriend does not define you but your self-worth and spirituality do. Relationships experience intimacy when both parties can sacrifice for one other . By definition, a bad boy is unable to offer sacrificial love.  Women often fool themselves into thinking that they are immune to falling for a bad boy. The affection of a bad boy is always performance-based and challenge-driven. Here are four reasons why good gir...

Brian M. Murray, MS, IMH Feeling stuck in life can bring about unsettling emotions and negative thinking. It can create questions in the mind about life, career, family and a whole host of other thinking patterns that can lead to major changes. Often the source of frustration for feeling stuck isn't so much about the position someone finds themselves as it is about how they think about how they see themselves in their current situation. This negative thinking pattern over time can lead into other issues such as low self-esteem, self-worth, depression and anxiety. To head this off at the pass before it gets to that level and therapy is needed to reverse course there are a few things a person can do to help get directed back into a positive mindset. Watch out for and filter internal self dialogue that has a critical voice saying something that leads to thinking "I'm not good enough and I'm incompetent." This can lead to feelings of guilt and shame which...

Brian M Murray, IMH   When meeting a person for the first time everything is exciting and brand new. It can seem like the feeling of true love is in the air. It is as if “Ah, finally, I have met the one true person in my life and this is it, the one who will make all the difference.” Let the counting begin how many times this has happened time and time again. Interesting, there appears to be a pattern developing. The new person is exciting to be around, lots of fun and gives us something to look forward to. In the story Bambi I believe the word was “Twitter-pated.” Human beings are social creatures and we enjoy spending time with others especially when it is romantic and new. But what happens when that love feeling in the beginning begins to turn into a scene like the Bad News Bears? The players take the field in nice uniforms and suddenly the scene changes to one of disruption, deception and dirty tricks. The person appears to fit all of the qualities we look for in a per...