The Lifeworks Group, Inc.

By: Nate Webster LMHC                         Many people have mixed feelings about Valentines Day. Some think its shallow and materialistic, others think it is romantic and important to their relationship. And of course there are those who are just reminded of how lonely they are on the holiday! But regardless of how you may feel about Valentines Day, Americans spend around 18 billion dollars a year on it, which is a lot of flowers, candy and cards. So where did Valentines Day come from and how is it celebrated around the world? Well there are three or four theories as to where it began. We know from history that the Catholic Church recognizes at least three saints named Valentine, each with various legends about who they were and what they did. The one that I really liked lived during the reign of Claudius the 2 nd , a ruler of Rome during the 2 nd and 3 rd ...

 By Nate Webster, LMHC             Understanding the difference between love and infatuation is important. The two get confused on a regular basis, but have very different definitions. There are three differences between love and infatuation. Love is about mutually giving, infatuation is about individualistically receiving             Infatuation is about getting what you want out of the relationship and usually results in turning the other person into an object. A kind of romantic, emotional vending machine, where you want them to give you what you want. You want them to say what you want to hear. You want them to feel the way you want them to feel about you.   Infatuation generally turns someone into a product, something to be used to get what the person desires. People who are infatuated often have a fantasy in their head and they make the other...

By Megan Muñoz, IMH Every relationship struggles with expectations, whether it is an expectation that is unspoken, unmet or out of our present awareness. Underneath the surface of frustration, sadness and hurt is an expectation that was not met.  Another way to think of an expectation is as a belief, and a belief that drives an expectation can be positive or negative. When we expect something to go wrong, it is because we have an internal belief that wrong is likely to happen. If we expect something to go well, it is because our internal thoughts are tied to the belief that what we are about to experience will go well.  The beliefs that drive our expectations are also tied to our past experiences that have shaped those beliefs. We are not always aware of our internal expectations because sometimes we are not consciously aware of what we believe about an approaching event or situation. Valentine’s Day is a day loaded with internal and external expectations. F...

 By Nate Webster, LMHC               My Aunt is an architect in British Columbia. She builds beautiful little cottages on the islands off the west coast around Vancouver Island. I once went on a road trip with her after I graduated high school and spent the whole summer picking her brain about architecture and interior design. A few years later I became a mental health counselor and found myself using architecture and interior design as a metaphor for how romantic relationships work. Interior design and architecture can teach us a lot about our romantic relationships. Let's look at the different things they can teach us.             The TV in the bedroom: TVs in the bedroom are a pretty popular amenity that people design their bedrooms to include. But they also act as a great representation for some of the issues that can arise in a relationship. ...